You’re Not a Money Person? Here’s How I Became One, Crying on a Black Mirror Floor
Chapter 2 | How I Paid Off $43K in Debt Using My Imagination
At this point in my journey through art, spirituality, and parts work, I can say something that still feels weird to say, but I am here to be honest with you.
Imagination is not a place of creation.
It’s a space of remembering.
I love the word create. I love it so much that I pay $34 a year to have it on my license plate. But the truth is, I don’t feel like I create anything, ever. I don’t create feelings, I don’t create money, I don’t create reality. I feel like I remember, things. I remember the creation, the feeling, the money, the plan, the adventure, one experience at a time.
In my imagination, I don’t invent things, they unfold. I let them reveal themselves to me. I let the landscape appears, I let the creatures come forward through feelings and sensations. That’s it, there’s nothing else.
See, whenever I try to create something, that’s when my art falls flat. That’s when I feel uninspired and disconnected from myself, money and the world.
This experience goes beyond words, but if you’re here, you probably get it.
You can tell when you’re trying to create something rather than remembering it. You look for outside inspiration. You build useless Pinterest boards, you try a thousand different angles to activate the energy inside you, you keep changing ideas along the way, etc.
When I find myself doing that, I know I’m resisting something. I know I’m lying to myself, trying to make it different from what it truly is. And of course, that’s exactly what I did with The Empire of Money. I tried to force it into existence, to mentally create it, to visualize it, but it never worked.
When it finally revealed itself to me, after days of feeling my pain, it didn’t match the idea I had for it. It didn’t fit the script of the story I wanted to write. It didn’t align with my expectations. Uh oh… As if I even had the right to expectations in the first place!
If you vow your life to magic like I did, you give up the right to expectations. It’s the first thing that needs to fuck off if you want to be truly amazed by life. Let the surprises move you, let the Universe do her shit! I swear, if you refuse to expect anything from anyone or anything, you will live a life that is absolutely, and literally, magical.
Well, even if it doesn’t seem magical at first…
Oh, hi. You’re about to read a chapter of How I Paid Off $43K in Debt Using My Imagination. It’s a series about money, shame, magic, and everything no one ever taught you about having debt. If this is your first time here, go back to Chapter 1. Otherwise, feel free to stay confused… just like you do with money.
Welcome, the lantern’s lit.
I told it a secret and it hasn’t stopped glowing since.